March 06, 2003

E is for Eavesdrop

Eavesdrop - To listen secretly to the private conversation of others.

While reading online blogs and journals, do you feel like you are eavesdropping? Do you feel like you are reading/seeing information that you "shouldn't" be reading/seeing?

When I started reading online journals about four years ago, there weren't that many to choose from. I read the "standards" and then some. I always felt like I was getting a glimpse into someone else's life. A glimpse that, perhaps, they didn't give to those live and in person around them. What made them do it? What made them put their lives up on the web for all to see? What made me want to read so many of them?

A few years ago I decided to take the plunge and put up a journal myself. It was mainly out of boredom and to keep my family a little more involved with my life while living overseas. There have been great months of OK writing but mostly months with sparse writing of a marginal nature. The thing is though, I've never felt that I was letting people in on any big secrets. Never felt like what I was writing was eavesdrop material. The things that I have shared here are things that at least a few people know about in my "real" life. I mean, there are just some things that you don't go talking about at work. "Hi, I'm Michelle and I gave a child up for adoption when I was 16!" I just don't see that as being a good business conversation opener. On the other hand, if someone asked me about it, I wouldn't lie.

Writing here has helped me work through a lot of emotions, especially those feelings surrounding the deaths of my Mom and little brother. There was so much that was left unsaid at the end. Just putting it out there, even knowing that they will never see or hear those words helped me to put those feelings in a better place.

Who knows...maybe they can eavesrop from wherever they are.


This has been an Alpha Bytes entry.

Posted by rowEn at 11:53 PM | Comments (2212)

I already miss him...

I feel like John is already gone yet he doesn't leave until next week. Thursday I think, but of course, that is always subject to change. I've heard as early as the 10th, as late as the 17th. I haven't seen him since Sunday evening. I will assume that they will be working this weekend (or at least, he will be). When will we have some time together?

He was nice enough to take the WildChild and go to the breifing for family members. I would have gone if not for the yuck work schedule. I got a cheesy little book about how we should be prepared for his being gone for a few months. We've been doing this for 17 years. Do they really think I need a book to tell me what to do? This isn't the first time he's gone away for more than a few weeks. I would like to hope that it is the last.

There are all kinds of pre-deployment breifings going on around base. I hear snippets of news here and there. Will it be my turn later this summer?

My Where do I stand entry seems to be quite popular today. Here is a link so that people don't have to search through the archives. Sitemeter won't work right for me so thanks to whoever linked to it. I think.

Lastly, I despise having to try and get a job on base. Do you know how damn hard it is to get your skills listed to the acceptable wording so that you can get picked up on referral lists? Well....it's damn hard! It is also depressing to think that I can't even get hired for less money than I'm making now. Obviously, teaching the skills doesn't mean they think I know them. I'm a spouse and an honorably discharged veteran. WHY can't I get hired someplace? Why must I keep moving around and missing out on any kind of job longevity? Well, besides the fact that I love my husband and don't want to have him moving all over the place by himself.

I need to go to work and try not to kill people. Wish me luck.

Posted by rowEn at 11:59 AM | Comments (0)